As the events of the past few weeks have unfolded I’ve found myself increasingly shocked. Shocked at the way police officers are treating protesters and shocked at the level of deep seeded anger that many of the protesters have. Watching videos like this one (https://twitter.com/chimdesires/status/1267198829775990787?s=19 ) I just don’t even understand what is happening. Almost any ordinary white person you show that video too will have this as the first thought (my god that is horrible….. I wonder what those two did before that video started that made the police so angry). In fact for reference here is an exact quote from one of my very close friends. I sent him the link to that video, and he replied:
Just watched the one with the cops pulling people out of the car. Makes me wonder why they did that. I mean it cant be like a random thing right? Like there was surly a reason, not just pulling some randos out of a car kinda like the editing made it seem…
It makes sense, most of us have never had a bad interaction with a cop in our life. They are the people you call when you need help. We (white people) are taught since childhood that cops are good, and honest. We should respect them. Almost every interaction I’ve had with a cop has been very pleasant. This is (hopefully) true about many cops but as I become an adult I can see that it is not a universal truth. It’s possible the people in this video did something to provoke the cops, but what on earth would be bad enough to provoke that type of response? Their car windows are bashed in, both front tires slit. The woman is pepper sprayed. The main is tazed and then the cops yell at him to get his hands up while he is writhing around from the tazer shot. Once they do get the man out of the car they beat him with a club. What on earth could possibly warrant that type of response? And finally, what if they did nothing at all? What if they were just driving through, like the two White people in the car in front of them were, and the cops did that for basically no reason. If you are a White person reading this think about that.
/—Update —
The full police video has been released. The people basically did nothing to cause the treatment they received by the cops. The cop reactions is quite literally, complete insane. Full Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FdOYCr3kQy4&feature=youtu.be
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I also realized, I think, why I have been so surprised. I don’t have any close black friends in my life, and I don’t think I’m the exception for most white people living in the Midwest. I’m just a simple guy from Missouri. I’ve always felt that I was not the least bit racist, I’ve been uncomfortable in so many situations when people I know or random people at a party make mildly racist jokes, but I’ve really never done anything about it other than just quietly fake laugh along with the crowd. I haven’t had a truly close black friend since freshmen year of high school. Growing up, one of my best friends and the first guy I meet in our neighborhood, was black. But guess what, they were the only black family in our neighborhood. It just so happened that when I moved there at the age of eight, his family were also one of the first families’ to move into the neighborhood which was under construction. I have so many great memories of spending time at their house, eating dinner with their family. Riding bikes with Dale. Some of my most vivid memories from that time span in my life (~age 8 – 15) was watching mike Tyson fights at Dales house. His mom LOVED Iron Mike, and she didn’t care that we were two young kids watching brutal knock outs, it was awesome! Around the age of 15 though Dale started getting into drugs. Drugs took Dale’s life on a quick downward spiral and he ultimately overdosed. I remember seeing his dad for the first time after Dale’s death; I’ll never forget how sad his face looked.
Really though telling this story of my friendship with Dale is the only experience I have. I have never had a close black friend since then. That was 16 years ago. I don’t see any quick way to improve our current situation. We can’t realistically identify and fire all of the bad cops. We can’t change the policing polices at the drop of a hat, that seems like it will take at least a generation. I also don’t see any good or inspiring candidates running to lead our local communities and country out of this horrible situation. On the presidential front the only good person I can see in close proximity is Michelle Obama, but she is not actually running and it’s understandable if she doesn’t want to put her family through another eight years of presidency.
So the only useful thought I have about a way to at least start to improve our current situation is that ordinary white people like me need to make an effort to have black friends; and by this experience we can learn and build compassion and understanding for a cause we had the privilege of previously ignoring. If ordinary white people like me actually get close enough to ordinary black people maybe we will understand and emphasize with their problems much better. Maybe we would actually believe them when they say cops attack them for no reason. Maybe together we could figure out how to fix some things.
So with that in mind I’m going to set a goal, a simple and modest goal. I’d like to make one close black friend before 2020 is over. That’s it, nothing fancy about it. I’d like to make a friend, have good times with them, and learn from them.